three really?
Why the sudden rush of enthusiasm?
Bahahahahahaha
Love ya Bambi.
Saturday, February 28, 2015
I
told Janet I was going to sleep all weekend.
Looks like I am off to a pretty good start lol.
Slept yesterday from 4-6:30 when I got home.
Slept from 2:30 - 11 AM this morning.
made breakfast.
Went right back to sleep.
Just woke up.
Now we are looking at a Wal-mart run, cooking some dinner, burning granny's chair (it finally gave out) and cooking some more green chilli chicken enchilada casserole.
Oh yeah, had something for ya when I woke up lol.
Once again you are derelict in your duties :-).
36 degrees here.
Rain comin.
Hopefully this snow is gone by Tuesday.
Love you.
ttys
Friday, February 27, 2015
OUR LOVE
Here is the thing.
Who cares if anybody else gets it?
Do you really care?
Does it really matter?
I know I don't.
If people don't get it?
Then fuck 'em.
Not their life.
Not their choice.
It's wat I have always said.
Bunch of jealous haters.
Grow a pair.
Take a chance.
Show some courage.
Might change your life.
Movin on.
I always said I would rather have 4 or 5 close friends that would fight tooth and nail for me, than have 3000 of which none would ever be around when I needed them.
Well, seems like those four or five are stepping forward these days.
Also seems like everybody already knows what stories I'm gonna tell them before I do, but we'll save that one for another day lol.
Four or five friends like that?
A smart pretty lil wife.
Intelligent son.
Wat else you really need?
I swear to you, I'm gonna spend Christmas Eve and Day, in my home, with my family.
If it fucking kills me...I'm gonna get there.
Promise.
Leonard Nimoy.
"Love is not struggle. Love is love. You can have arguments and love each other. You can go through hard times and love each other. If you can find a relationship where it's easy to give it and get it, then a lot of that stuff takes care of itself."
Thursday, February 26, 2015
Looks
like my kinda joint.
What would you order?
The blue plate special? The meatloaf?
A hand dipped milk shake?
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Just
me here right now.
Tell me to come right now.
Lil Miss "Real Woman".
Wat do you think would happen?
Yeah
I aint gettin them no more.
"Lord have mercy girl, what ever did I do right?"
So...
what in the world did I ever do wrong?
Love ya Lucy.
Wednesday, February 25, 2015
Fav
piece of MC Escher art work.
"Bond of Union"
Self portrait of him and his wife, 1956.
I'm not even going to tell you what this was printed on the first time I ever saw it :-).
Figure it out :-).
Think, Lucy in The Sky with Diamonds :-).
I'm
not so sure about my comparison to the Bozo the Clown Bop Bag any more.
I'm thinking maybe Timex would have been more appropriate.
"It's takes a licking and keeps on ticking."
Bahahahahahahahaha.
Get it?
It takes a licking?
Bahahahahahahahah.
Oh, you are so not the only one that cracks themselves up Lucy.
Are
you getting my point Lucy?
Forget about the groceries sweetheart :-).
Expect the unexpected.
Always.
Promise.
WARMTH AND DRYNESS
Columbia Double Wammy Parka, 13 years old. Columbia thick ass sweater thing, 17 years old. LL Bean six eyelet Maine Hunting Boots, 20 years old. The defacto severe cold weather outfit for some time now. Frugality explained, with warmth, dryness and comfort, all in one picture.
Oh
so the off to Boneheadville Post gets a three but the other 15 leading up to it don't huh?
Nice.
What happened to Dorkian2's post about wanting to break me into?
Where did that go Lucy?
Seems like "a real woman" would already be doing so.
Bahahahahahaha
Did I really
just get a good morning sunshine from ya?
Aw...
How sweet.
Back to bed.
Nothing but tossing and turning still.
Sux.
Love you.
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
Didn't
sleep a wink lol.
Tossed and turned for three hours.
Whatever, used to it by now.
Lovin this a lot these days.
Well I've been ridin' a winning horse for a long, long time
Sometimes I wonder is this the end of the line
No one should take advantage of who they are
No man has got it made
If he thinks he does, he's wrong
Every mother's son better hear what I say
Every mother's son will rise and fall someday
I've seen it happen so many times, so many times before
Some man got so much money he doesn't worry no more
Or he's got such a pretty woman that'll treat him fine
Well my friend has been a fool
It happens every time
Every mother's son better hear what I say
Every mother's son will rise and fall someday
I'm not tryin' to preach to no one, to no one at all
I've seen so many of my good friends just rise to fall
'Cause they got so much money or a woman so fine
Well my friends have all been fools, it happens every time
Every mother's son better hear what I say
Every mother's son will rise and fall someday
What I say
Every mother's son better hear what I say
Every mother's son will rise and fall someday
What I say
Oh, every mother's son will rise and fall someday
Forgot how goo of a record "Gimme back my bulletts" really was.
Not a bad song on it.
Love you.
Knucklehead.
Still
missin some threes there Knucklehead :-).
Had breakfast at moms.
Got her and Al all updated about things.
Got done what I could.
22 hours sleep since 9:30 AM Friday and people wonder, "What's wrong with him? Why is he so grumpy or just wanna be alone for?"
Well lol...
Maybe they should try it sometime lol.
I feel like all of us do pretty well all things considered.
Gotta lay back down.
After some more RATM and Skynard.
ttys.
Love you Bambi.
Morning
Sunshine.
Cookin breakfast for Nich.
Then over to moms for breakfast for me.
Then errands.
Then a long ass nap lol.
Love you.
ttys.
Monday, February 23, 2015
Accidentally
deleted the post about today's craziness lol.
Oh well, don't really feel like rewriting it either :-).
RATM huh?
I'll believe it when I see it :-).
Love you.
Put 'em back
"...Been up and down since I turned seventeen
Well I've been on top, and then it seems I lost my dream
But I got it back, I'm feelin' better everyday
Tell all those pencil pushers, better get out of my way..."
Past
your bedtime Lucy.
Night sweetheart.
Love you.
Hope you and you family are doing well.
Stay warm and safe.
Sweet dreams.
Sunday, February 22, 2015
Tryin...
It's not the easiest thing in the world to do and sometimes people, even those close to you for a long time won't like it.
Oh well.
Tough.
Moving on.
You
were the first person I let know about being on the side of the road with the truck.
I didn't think or hesitate.
It was like I was unconscious and the phone just jumped in my hand and I started texting.
Then I started working on what to do.
Thank goodness for Janet and James.
Would have been up a creek without a paddle.
Things work out.
They always do.
They say the first person you want to tell important news to say a lot.
Like I said it was like I looked down and the phone was already in my hand and I was texting and I wasn't even aware of it just yet.
Love you.
I'm
entirely serious.
I always has this image of us sitting in that truck.
Me 80 years old.
Driving us to McDonalds.
Taking my wife out for a date.
Getting a cheeseburger lol.
Maybe splitting a happy meal.
I can see you sitting there next to me.
That long beautiful grey hair.
Holding hands.
Riding to McDonald's.
No other truck ever gonna do Lucy.
It's just not the image I had in my mind.
Found
a reconditioned engine for $700.
Even with 24 hours labor at $60 an hour we're talking around $2000.
Beats a damn truck payment.
Just gotta take the one time hit and keep trucking.
It's all I know to do.
It's all I have ever done.
Don't let it get ya down.
Just keep plodding through.
What else can you do?
I would just like to get it home somehow to deal with local people, I or someone I know, knows.
Remember what I told you about once I have a plan?
Once I have a plan, I'm good, till then?
Well...lol.
Maybe not so much sometimes :-).
Love you Lucy.
I'm
hanging in there Lucy.
Slept solid from 7:30 - 2.
I didn't try to go back to sleep.
Janet had said something about the car battery.
I was scared it wouldn't start.
Figured I better get up.
Hard to go back to sleep anyway after I wake up.
Janet said the battery tested fine they just couldn't see a sticker to see how old it was.
I had forgot she had mentioned that.
My mind has been a lil preoccupied lately to say the least lol.
It's a nice vehicle.
It will serve Nicholas good.
Called the garage where the truck is.
Told them what was going on with the oil pressure.
Just want it fixed good enough to get it home.
Remembered Alan saying he had someone find a reconditioned Toyota engine and put it in his car for $750.
That might just be the way to go.
Doing better.
Just wanna go home and sleep.
For like two days lol.
Just wish we were together already.
Don't understand.
I want to take you out on date night when I am eighty years old, maybe go to McDonald's and get a hamburger, yes, in my old Nissan truck.
I told James and Carlos yesterday that if I had the money I would take it somewhere and just drop it off and say "Make it like new again." Carlos was all about pimping it out lol. I was like "No, not even that Carlos, just put a new engine in it, a new exhaust system, James chimed in, "a new transmission", I was like "yeah, some new wheels, belts, hoses, pumps, radiator, just fix it up, the only lil extra I would want would be a new sound system, something with USB and Bluetooth, no fancy wheels or anything, just make it new again."
They both looked at me like "OMG, he is going to do this."
Why is that Lucy?
I'm
just tired.
Feel a lil beat down every once in a while.
This weather lol.
I was looking forward to some 50 degree days.
Now even that seems like its weeks away.
Love ya Lucy.
Thanks for putting up with me Hotrod.
I mean
is it a month?
Or is it three months?
I asked you a while back to figure out a way to let me know somehow.
I've been stressed the fuck out since before my birthday.
Feel like nobody listen to or cares what I have to say.
It's like people expect me to understand that nobody listens to or cares what I have to say.
Not saying that's how it is.
Saying thats what it feels like.
It feels like "Oh don't worry about him, he will be okay."
Thats a familiar feeling.
I remember it all to well.
Went down that path way to many times.
I don't like it.
I want that feeling to be buried.
For good.
Forever.
Soon.
And I want to know approximately when Bambi.
Love you.
You're
killing me Lucy.
I hate not having my truck already :-(.
Been in this shit hole for 36 hours.
Slept on a couch.
I'm to old for this shit.
My MC lives in his parents basement.
He is am imbecile.
Can't write a grammatically correct sentence or spell.
This is the guy they put in management lol.
Don't have you :-(.
Don't have my truck :-(.
Don't know whats going on or when ;-(.
Wears on me.
Get sick of it.
It gets old.
Wanna ride.
Fucking never ending winter in late Feb.
Single digit lows comin this week.
More snow Sunday and Mon and Tues.
Had enough sometimes, you know?
Just feel like, "Oh, just wait till Sept 6th, no wait till Christmas, no spring, no...just on and on and on with no end in sight...ever...there goes another birthday, there goes another Christmas, there goes another Valentines Day, there goes another...another...another...they just keep rolling on...
So when then?
What if you were me?
That's my question for you.
That's always been my question for you.
How would you feel?
How "positive" would you be feeling right now?
I gotta get.
I love you with all my heart and soul and having you as my wife and Nich being happy is all I ever really want out of life for going on three years now...
But I am so fucking tired...
These days and hours are killing me.
They are taking away from the time I could be spending with you.
And it just continues...
Easy for others to say stay positive, they haven't lived this.
It just not easy, and from time to time, it feels like it's not very appreciated.
I apologize for the winter blah's and all but the weather and this situation and my truck?
It's enough.
Okay, there I said my piece.
Love you.
Night.
Saturday, February 21, 2015
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Released
2/21 1965.
"I'm a gonna tell ya how it's gonna be
You're gonna give your love to me
A love that will last more than one day
Well you know my love won't fade away..."
Curves ahead :-). I hope so.
"I wasn't naked, I was completely covered by a blue spotlight" -Gypsy Rose Lee
I
wanted to take you on dates in that truck :-(.
Always have.
Ever since you said it had "character" :-).
Well, duh, why wouldn't it have?
Bahahahahahaha.
I told James
"I knew either the truck, me, or the house wasn't going to make it this winter."
He smiled and said, "Well aren't you glad it's the truck?"
We both chuckled.
He has had hard times, he knows whats its like.
I can respect that.
Plus we had a good laugh.
I give him a hard time sometimes.
Just like Christian a some others.
Lord knows we all got our faults.
But by God when I needed him he was there in a heartbeat.
Says a lot.
Means a lot.
Just
want to know when.
I don't wanna put a whole ton of money in the truck if you already know you don't want me to keep it.
Thats a decision I would rather make together.
I'd like to keep it.
But I got a feeling the repair is going to be to expensive and I'll be driving Nich's SUV for a while.
Oh well.
Love you Bambi.
Now
I can't do my Koronos Reboots cause NT is doing something lol.
I wish I had just stayed in bed lol.
Friday, February 20, 2015
I
tried to find the scene from the movie but all they had was him at the end.
None of them had the part of him and her running through the train station :-(.
I feel
like Carlito in Carlito's way.
Tryin to make that train.
Everything's in place.
Just running to make it out.
Start a new life.
Start over.
Only Carlito's way didn't end so well.
It's just the part about him running to that train and what it represents for him.
Thats what I feel like.
24\7.
Even in my sleep I feel like I am running like that.
To get to my version of that train.
Tired of working for imbeciles and unappreciative moronic idiots Lucy.
Had my fill.
If there is ever so much as flurries I am not heading this way ever again.
Not worth it.
They can't pay me enough for what my time is worth.
Not these days they can't.
Never again will they be able too.
No one will be able too.
Just hangin on.
Tryin to make that train.
It's never came before.
Thats the problem.
Thats my inner struggle.
That or every other one I got on thinking I was heading somewhere I wanted to go and it ended up at a destination I didn't wanna be.
That aint happening this time.
I'm not Carlito.
I'm getting on that train.
I know where it goes.
Peace.
Exactly.
Thanks
for getting back with me so quick in Skype.
It's appreciated.
Tells me a lot.
Hope your warm and well.
You, your family, your pets, everyone.
I'm good.
Just don't wanna give up on the truck.
Hope it's fixable.
Janet seemed like she already knew
If not?
Oh well, move on.
If I have ever learned anything, it's that when mom says, "Don't worry about ANYTHING...keep the faith."
Then it's best to just not worry about anything and to just keep the faith :-).
I didn't want to go through another winter like this lol.
I really didn't :-).
Mom
says keep the faith.
Says for me to: "Don't worry about ANYTHING to do with the truck."
Mom gotta way of telling me without telling me outright as well Lucy :-).
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