I've

had three people tell me in the past week that if they came into a large windfall they would help people if they could...well duh...

Nicholas going around the house Friday "bout to GTFO..." (Get the fuck outta here...)

Christian asking how long I've known him for...

Alan talking about a wedding of "Two crazy people" cause the main thing they wanted was not to see each other before the wedding...

Commercial came on for jaguar, lease payment was like  "Only $729." Alan said "Yeah, only..." I said, "Yeah, at that price I'll take four of them."...he just sat there like, dude, you just may...

Meanwhile back in my reality we struggle.

Daily.

Week to week.

We struggle.

Have my whole life.

Just because you get used to something doesn't mean it doesn't suck Lucy.

Mind starting to wonder on me again.

Is this really real?

Is it really happening?

Wish I knew.

I don't know whats up, think I got a pretty good guess but I really don't know or can't say.

I do know all I care about at this point is seeing you in that dress, walking toward me (with Nich by my side), Tom Petty playin...not a dry eye to be had anywhere.

Thats it.

It's all I care about.

Everything else will manage to take care of itself someway.

All this nonsense SMC bullshit they got us doing?

Just made worse by knowing were not going to be here much longer.

Just want it to stop.

Adam has "A wedding to do" on Oct.18th.

James talking about going to a wedding with his gf, somebody from her work, neither of them knowing anybody that will be there that much.

Alan yesterday with his comments yesterday.

Love you Virgie.

Just want my mind at peace sweetheart.