Your jaw dropped.
Seriously lol.
Like literally sprung open lol.
I was sitting there waiting for it.
I knew which picture was next.
Bahahahahahahahaha
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Random ramblings from an amateur rock-n-roll historian and critic,self-professed bourbon aficionado, blackberry growin', jam makin', sometime tie-die shirt makin', ex hippie wannabe, turned punk rock lovein', blues festival going, middle aged pudgy bald white guy who loves to wear Hawaiian shirts in the summertime and happens to be more Stax than Motown, more Alman Brothers than Skynard, more Stones than Beatles, more NASCAR than Baseball, more freeware than license keys...
Recently listened to......
- Florence and the Machine
- Jason and the Scorchers
- U2
- OZZY
- Simon and Garfunkel
- Talking Heads
- Grand Funk Railroad
- Lightnin' Hopkins
- Lynyrd Skynyrd
- Goverment Cheese
- Springsteen
- R.E.M
- Amos Lee
- Bob Marley
- Bob Dylan
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Current Favorite Sayings.................
- "tent stakes and bungee cords"
- "boredom, the first step on the road to relapse"
- "a lil Elmore James never hurt anybody!!"
- "camo, the new tie -die"
- "How's it growing?"
- "I'll come at you like a Spider Monkey."
- "I'm giraffeassed..."
- "Is it porch thirty yet?"
- "It's not her. it's her species"
- "Lift nozzle, select grade"
- "Never trust a cheeseburger you can't take the bun off of."
- "Never trust a rock-n-roll band that can't play at least five Chuck Berry songs."
- "Satisfying more desperate housewives than the spin cycle."
- "she's not drunk, she's just mean!"
- "swampadelic!!!"
- "We self medicate the depression that is a direct result of the obsessive compulsiveness"
- "what's crackalackin?"
- "Your curse is my blessing"
Quotes from the 09 WC Handy Blues Fest
- "We're an army and we're growing"
- "Thats award winnin strutin' right there"
- "That's shakin' it like the pros do"
- "It's just Jimi passin' by"
- "I walked in the door and saw hubert and my old lady doing the funky chicken right down in the middle of the floor"
- "I spent $500 to save you $300, thats almost half off"
- "I hate loud music, blues music and Heat"
- "I don't know, that might be Jimi and Stevie"
- "I don't buy enough shit to try and talk people down to start with"
- "as long as you don't have that 38 it's all cool!"
People Of The WC Handy Blues fest
- Ol' Dancin' Couple
- Freaky Lookin' Dude
- Mother and Daughter
- Purple Hat Lady
- Old Soldier
- Got Grey Hair Now Duse
- Subnet.com People
- T- Shirt Guy
Quotes from "Porch Night Out"
- "...are there any ding dongs left?..."
- "...are those the Cheetos?...
- "...can a brother get a lil ananimity?..."
- "What was I supposed to be writing?..."
- "YEAH!!......I'm sorry what?..."
- "...there aint no dope on Bowling Green..."
- "...somebodys got to drive my fat ass to Philpot..."
- "...snapper shit..."
- "...18 to 80, blind, crippled, or crazy..."
- "...higher than a hippie on a helicopter ride..."
- "...Whiskey Dicked..."
Quotes from Bowling Green Trip
- Andrew, "Look a trailer with Christmas lights on it". "Thats not a trailer, thats a school bus!, and it doesn't have Christmas lights on it", Dave
- Andrew, "Is the computer on?". "No you have to turn it on for it to be on", NA
- "Well, it is getting toward wintertime", NA on Big breasted women.
- "She wont get horny, she'll just get pissed off", BC
- "Now do you want to smoke paper or do you want to smoke...", NA
- "I'm squinting, everything s blurry..."Andrew
- "I might just gateway across the spectrum", Dave
Overheard in Hancocok County
Criminal Girl, "oh shit, that wasn't the ash can!, that was my purse!!, Preacher Man, "If you go messing around with a skunk, you ought naught be surprised when you end up a little smelly.""If your clean, you aint eating it right", guy eating barbq.Country Boy, "I think those jerks on first shift were trying to poison us."Country Boys' Date, "Well, you didn't have to eat it now did you?"Country Boy, "But it was pizza". Big Guy to Clerk: "look at me, does it look like I want cheese sauce?"Overheard from phone: "Why the hell are you watching that?" Reply "Because it's on." Country Boy, "She got fired for doing some guy in the parking lot. Typical Tell City Chick..." Country Boy, "It done dried!"
Overheard at Work
- "Has anybody seen the hemostats?"
- "How are you?" "I'm doing well. It's early."
- "I aint in any hurry."
- "I am the queen of 8:15"
- "I don't care if she takes over a Russian satalite with it..."
- "I don't know anything, I'm just a suit"
- "I plan on being reasonably functional for most of the day"
- "I tried to reformat it, but it takes a frigin' act of congress or somethin'..."
- "I'm like a brownie at a weight watchers meeting, I'm gone..."
- "I'm not their boss, and I'm not their moma..."
- "It would help to have your mouse over the link, yes..."
- "It's a vortex of evil down there"
- "It's not that I'm not listening to you, it's that I am having trouble comprehending you"
- "Just click it with your mouth."
- "Man, it's fried", "Like chicken..."
- "The only thing I'm handy with is a doughnut"
- "Why don't you go troubleshoot a Network Printer or something?"
- "You are starting to scare me with your new found caffinefreeness..."
- "You might not want to mess with me, I have a bladder infection"
Great Music Quotes
"If they wanted to name rock-n-roll something else, they could have called it Chuck Berry", John Lennon."Tune low and play hard", Stevie Ray Vaughn
"What do I want a pick for, I got five of them on my hand." Gatemouth Brown "The Grateful Dead should be sponsored by the government -- a public service." Jerry Garcia "Rhythm is something you either have or you don't have, but when you have it, you have it all over." Elvis Presley "Free your mind and your ass will follow." George Clinton
"What do I want a pick for, I got five of them on my hand." Gatemouth Brown "The Grateful Dead should be sponsored by the government -- a public service." Jerry Garcia "Rhythm is something you either have or you don't have, but when you have it, you have it all over." Elvis Presley "Free your mind and your ass will follow." George Clinton
Great Guitarists
Jimi Hendrix, Chuck Berry, Tab Benoit, SRV, Pete Townshend, Eddie Van Halen, Pete Anderson, Steve Cropper, Eric Clapton, Jimmy Page, James Burton, Ron Wood, Jimmy Page, Keith Richards, Carlos Santana, Freddie King, Albert King, B.B. King, John Lee Hooker, Robert Cray, Prince, The Edge, Duane Allman, Dickey Betts, Slash, Joe Walsh, Joe Lewis Walker, Bo Diddley, Muddy Waters, Kim Thayil, Albert Collins, Lonnie Mack, Buddy Guy, Bonnie Rait, "Gatemouth" Brown, Johnny Winter, Tinsley Ellis, Lightnin Hopkins, Jimmy Reed, Robert Johnson, T-Bone Walker, Tommy Castro, Hubert Sumlin, Tom Morello, Elmore James, Brian Jones, Jeff Beck, Mike Campbell, Steve Via...
Great Keyboardists
Jerry Lee Lewis,
Little Richard,
Johnie Johnson,
Booker T. Jones,
Ray charles,
Billy Preston,
Fats Domino,
Roy Bittan,
Pinetop Perkins,
Bernie Worrell,
Benmont Tench,
Sly Stone
Great Bass Players
Duck Dunn, Jaco Pastorius, John Entwistle, John Paul Jones, Bill Wyman, Jack Bruce, Robbie Shakespear,
Bootsy Collins, Tony Levine, Willie Dixon, Les Claypool, Noel Redding, Flea, Adam Clayton
About Me
Current Critter Count Summer 07
2 Turtles, (1 released, I think it was a she and she was preggers) 4 Frogs (1 of them a Tree Frog, 1 of them about as big as thr tip of my index finger), 2 salamanders, countless worms and lightning bugs, 1 big ugly lookin' thing with wings on it...
Summertime TV Watching
Andrew's, "Legal trouble Blues", Playlist
- Get out Of My Life Woman, Freddie King
- Helhound On My Trail, Robert Johnson
- Used To Love Her, Gun's N' Roses
- Cocaine Blues, George Thorogood & The Destroyers
- Wanted Dead Or Alive, Bon Jovi
- The Next Miss Wrong (Live), Tinsley Ellis
- Living With The law, Chris Whitley
- Trouble, Lindsey Buckingham
- 99 to Life, Social Distortion
- Dream Police, Cheap Trick
- Fight The Power, Public Enemy
- Copperhead Road, Steve Earle
- Evil, Willie Dixon
- Crazy Bitch, Buckcherry
- Friend Of The Devil, Grateful Dead
- Highway To Hell, AC-DC
- 54-46 That's My Number, Toots Hibbert Feat. Jeff Beck
- Folsom Prison Blues, Johnny Cash
- I Shot The Sheriff, Bob Marley
- Bad Boys Get Spanked, The Pretenders
- I Fought The Law, The Clash
The Halloween Play List
- "Moanin' at Midnight", Howlin Wolf
- "War Pigs", Black Sabbath
- "Black Cat Bone", Albert Collins
- "Superstition", Stevie Wonder
- "Psycho Killer", The Talking Heads
- "Paint it Black", The Rolling Stones
- "Scar Tissue" Red Hot Chilli Peppers
- "Spirits in the Material World", The Police
- "Voodoo Woman", Koko Taylor
- "Deja Voodoo", Kenny Wayne Shepard
- "Voodoo Chile" Stevie Ray Vaughn
- "Black Magic Woman", Santana
- "People Are Strange", The Doors
- "Ashes to Ashes" , David Bowie (album: Scary Monsters)
- "Bittersweet", Big Head Todd and the Monsters
- "Rock and Roll All Nite", Kiss
- "Superman", R.E.M.
- "Werewolves of London", Warren Zevon
- "More Human Than Human", White Zombie
2008 CURRENT CRITTER COUNT
2 Turtles
1 Frog1 Crayfish
1 Salamander Tail
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