My conversation with "John"...

Had an interesting conversation with an individual named "John" today. John called me from your cell phone. He said he was your boyfriend and that you were scared for your "physically saftey" at this point. John isnt John, John is Travis sweetheart. Did I mention I hate it when somebody thinks I'm stupid? I see and have complete resolution with what is and has been going on now. More of a sense of relief than anything, all the pieces have finally fell together. It's a good thing. It's funny how you were never scared for you physical saftey when I went to Cookville, or when I went to Baxter, or when I went to your mom's residence. Seems like if I was really scaring you, that would have been the time to say something, not six weeks later, that story just doesn't add up. No way you say what you did with Adam Somed and do that lil dance you did for me and then your scared. He's scared, cause things are coming to a head and he's loosing you. If you are scared for your physical saftey it is from the fear of what "John" may do, not from me. Twenty page views on the blog the day after the Black Crowes show? From someone who is scared? Hardly, more like from someone who sees how they want to live their life. "John"...didn't even have the guts to tell me his real name. My pourpose in life is to protect you and Nicholas from any physical harm that I can. Thats my mission, thats my calling, thats my role, thats my duty. It's what I was put here to do. Protect you, not harm you.

It's funny. I know your going to check here and see if there was anything posted. It's the last safe place for me to message you, so I will. Great minds think alike. No wonder you went away. He found out about POF, text, Yahoo etc...everytime I thought you were running from me, it was actually him finding out about you :-(...This love is devine, it flows from on high, fear comes rom an evil place, love defeates evil everytime...eveytime.

John is scared, his emotional punching bag is slipping away from him, he can feel it, hell, I can feel it or he wouldn't be responding the way he did today. I pray for your saftey. Going forward, I will only seek to communicate with you from here. Only because I know you can see this at your work on computers there. Do a bunch of page views by opening and closing the browser tab and I'll see it and I'll know to continue posting. I'll see the number of page views, (they don't count my own) and I 'll know you saw what I had to say. Nobody else ever looks at this anymore but you. I'll never post anything unless it's for you. Consider this a shrine to our love dingleberry.

No wonder you mask the numbers. It's not that you want to, you feel you have to to protect yourself from him. That's sad. It's no way to live your life. But that's a choice you are making. If that's something you feel like you have to continue to live with, thats the choice you have made and you will live with the consequences of those decisions for the rest of your life. I have no doubt, he has threatened your life, his life, my life, etc...It's what they do. It's no way to live...

John said some interesting things in our conversation. He was going to file this complaint and that complaint and he had been to the sherrifs office with you and done this and done that. I wouldn't have done any of that. I would have just went with you to file the harrassment charges. I don't know how many text there have been over the last year, 1000's...to go now and say your scared for your physicaly saftey? Prosecuters where I live would have told you to change the number. He said he was going to hack into work and make all kinds of HIPPA violations in my name etc etc etc...so he obviously knows a lil about me. He said he will come where I live. Okay. Agian, who is stoping him? Be a bully to a bully and they crawfish everytime. I saw the look in his eyes in Cookeville, he wasn't so emboldened then. Easy to hide behind a phone. But why all the threats? Just do it if thats what he wants to do, nobody is stoping him. "I will make it my point in life...blah blah blah..."...he said. Maybe it scared others away in the past and they thought this just aint worth it. Well I aint them and theirs wasn't true love. "John" doesn't scare me. I tell Nicholas all the time. The people that threaten to do things all the time? They never do it. People that do things don't threaten others with it. They just go do it. "John" is threatening things these days only because "John" feels threatened. Thats pretty easy to see. His emotional punching bag is slipping away from his control. Once your mind has been expanded sweetie, it never fits back in the same box..."It's like he brainwashed her" the neighbor said. Now I know in no uncertian terms what she meant. Even Nicholas could figure that one out. He also said something of the effect of "...so just go to the bar...". Tells me all I need to know about him right there. That's what he would do, that's probably what he does while your at home alone and miserable. I don't go to bars, never did, never will, really just never saw the attraction. Funny how people think we must all think like they do. That's him projecting himself onto me. How about "No Thanks".

You don't have to live this way, you just don't. Your making a choice to do so, based largely on fear. It's understandable and since your saftey from any more of his abuse is paramount at this point then I will not text or email. Only post things here.

Tina Turner was abused every which way by Ike Turner. Sexually, physically, verbally, emotionaly, for years and years on end she endured this. Finally one day after a brutal beating she walked into a Hotel in Beverly Hills, nose bleeding, black eyes, bloddy lips...her voice quivering, the desk clerk just looked at her like "what is this?" It was Beverly Hills. She told him she didn't have a penny, she didn't have a credit card, but she needed a room or she was going to be dead. The clerk, agianst all rules, got a room for her, she nursed herself back to health, got the restarining order agianst Ike. Eventually she paid the money back to the hotel. Went on to have a wonderful solo carreer she never could have had with Ike. To this day she credits that hotel clerk for saving her life and for helping her see she COULD get out from under Ike's control.

Sweetheart, I'm your hotel clerk. When the time is right, a year from now, two years from now, tomorrow, whenever...pack a bag in the middle of the night when he is passed out asleep and come start your new life with us. I will not let any harm come to you that I myself can prevent. This is my promise, this is my dream, this is what I will work hard everyday of my life for, all day, every day, till the end of days...peace.