Army of the Ozone Skip

Random ramblings from an amateur rock-n-roll historian and critic,self-professed bourbon aficionado, blackberry growin', jam makin', sometime tie-die shirt makin', ex hippie wannabe, turned punk rock lovein', blues festival going, middle aged pudgy bald white guy who loves to wear Hawaiian shirts in the summertime and happens to be more Stax than Motown, more Alman Brothers than Skynard, more Stones than Beatles, more NASCAR than Baseball, more freeware than license keys...

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Biker Humour...

If you can figure it out...

Flathead

Knucklehead

Panhead

Ironhead

Shovelhead

Blockhead

Fathead

Deadhead

Goodhead

Bahahahahahaha

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Current Favorite Sayings.................

"tent stakes and bungee cords"
"boredom, the first step on the road to relapse"
"a lil Elmore James never hurt anybody!!"
"camo, the new tie -die"
"How's it growing?"
"I'll come at you like a Spider Monkey."
"I'm giraffeassed..."
"Is it porch thirty yet?"
"It's not her. it's her species"
"Lift nozzle, select grade"
"Never trust a cheeseburger you can't take the bun off of."
"Never trust a rock-n-roll band that can't play at least five Chuck Berry songs."
"Satisfying more desperate housewives than the spin cycle."
"she's not drunk, she's just mean!"
"swampadelic!!!"
"We self medicate the depression that is a direct result of the obsessive compulsiveness"
"what's crackalackin?"
"Your curse is my blessing"

Quotes from the 09 WC Handy Blues Fest

"We're an army and we're growing"
"Thats award winnin strutin' right there"
"That's shakin' it like the pros do"
"It's just Jimi passin' by"
"I walked in the door and saw hubert and my old lady doing the funky chicken right down in the middle of the floor"
"I spent $500 to save you $300, thats almost half off"
"I hate loud music, blues music and Heat"
"I don't know, that might be Jimi and Stevie"
"I don't buy enough shit to try and talk people down to start with"
"as long as you don't have that 38 it's all cool!"

Quotes from Bowling Green Trip

Andrew, "Look a trailer with Christmas lights on it". "Thats not a trailer, thats a school bus!, and it doesn't have Christmas lights on it", Dave
Andrew, "Is the computer on?". "No you have to turn it on for it to be on", NA
"Well, it is getting toward wintertime", NA on Big breasted women.
"She wont get horny, she'll just get pissed off", BC
"Now do you want to smoke paper or do you want to smoke...", NA
"I'm squinting, everything s blurry..."Andrew
"I might just gateway across the spectrum", Dave

Overheard in Hancocok County

Criminal Girl, "oh shit, that wasn't the ash can!, that was my purse!!, Preacher Man, "If you go messing around with a skunk, you ought naught be surprised when you end up a little smelly.""If your clean, you aint eating it right", guy eating barbq.Country Boy, "I think those jerks on first shift were trying to poison us."Country Boys' Date, "Well, you didn't have to eat it now did you?"Country Boy, "But it was pizza". Big Guy to Clerk: "look at me, does it look like I want cheese sauce?"Overheard from phone: "Why the hell are you watching that?" Reply "Because it's on." Country Boy, "She got fired for doing some guy in the parking lot. Typical Tell City Chick..." Country Boy, "It done dried!"

Overheard at Work

"Has anybody seen the hemostats?"
"How are you?" "I'm doing well. It's early."
"I aint in any hurry."
"I am the queen of 8:15"
"I don't care if she takes over a Russian satalite with it..."
"I don't know anything, I'm just a suit"
"I plan on being reasonably functional for most of the day"
"I tried to reformat it, but it takes a frigin' act of congress or somethin'..."
"I'm like a brownie at a weight watchers meeting, I'm gone..."
"I'm not their boss, and I'm not their moma..."
"It would help to have your mouse over the link, yes..."
"It's a vortex of evil down there"
"It's not that I'm not listening to you, it's that I am having trouble comprehending you"
"Just click it with your mouth."
"Man, it's fried", "Like chicken..."
"The only thing I'm handy with is a doughnut"
"Why don't you go troubleshoot a Network Printer or something?"
"You are starting to scare me with your new found caffinefreeness..."
"You might not want to mess with me, I have a bladder infection"

Great Music Quotes

Great Guitarists

Jimi Hendrix, Chuck Berry, Tab Benoit, SRV, Pete Townshend, Eddie Van Halen, Pete Anderson, Steve Cropper, Eric Clapton, Jimmy Page, James Burton, Ron Wood, Jimmy Page, Keith Richards, Carlos Santana, Freddie King, Albert King, B.B. King, John Lee Hooker, Robert Cray, Prince, The Edge, Duane Allman, Dickey Betts, Slash, Joe Walsh, Joe Lewis Walker, Bo Diddley, Muddy Waters, Kim Thayil, Albert Collins, Lonnie Mack, Buddy Guy, Bonnie Rait, "Gatemouth" Brown, Johnny Winter, Tinsley Ellis, Lightnin Hopkins, Jimmy Reed, Robert Johnson, T-Bone Walker, Tommy Castro, Hubert Sumlin, Tom Morello, Elmore James, Brian Jones, Jeff Beck, Mike Campbell, Steve Via...

Andrew's, "Legal trouble Blues", Playlist

Get out Of My Life Woman, Freddie King
Helhound On My Trail, Robert Johnson
Used To Love Her, Gun's N' Roses
Cocaine Blues, George Thorogood & The Destroyers
Wanted Dead Or Alive, Bon Jovi
The Next Miss Wrong (Live), Tinsley Ellis
Living With The law, Chris Whitley
Trouble, Lindsey Buckingham
99 to Life, Social Distortion
Dream Police, Cheap Trick
Fight The Power, Public Enemy
Copperhead Road, Steve Earle
Evil, Willie Dixon
Crazy Bitch, Buckcherry
Friend Of The Devil, Grateful Dead
Highway To Hell, AC-DC
54-46 That's My Number, Toots Hibbert Feat. Jeff Beck
Folsom Prison Blues, Johnny Cash
I Shot The Sheriff, Bob Marley
Bad Boys Get Spanked, The Pretenders
I Fought The Law, The Clash

The Halloween Play List

"Moanin' at Midnight", Howlin Wolf
"War Pigs", Black Sabbath
"Black Cat Bone", Albert Collins
"Superstition", Stevie Wonder
"Psycho Killer", The Talking Heads
"Paint it Black", The Rolling Stones
"Scar Tissue" Red Hot Chilli Peppers
"Spirits in the Material World", The Police
"Voodoo Woman", Koko Taylor
"Deja Voodoo", Kenny Wayne Shepard
"Voodoo Chile" Stevie Ray Vaughn
"Black Magic Woman", Santana
"People Are Strange", The Doors
"Ashes to Ashes" , David Bowie (album: Scary Monsters)
"Bittersweet", Big Head Todd and the Monsters
"Rock and Roll All Nite", Kiss
"Superman", R.E.M.
"Werewolves of London", Warren Zevon
"More Human Than Human", White Zombie

Randomness
Do you have any pets?	Turtle
What color shirt are you wearing?	Tie die
Name three things that are physically close to you:	Computer, Chair, Phone
What is the last book you read?	The history of rock - n - roll
Are you or were you a good student?	Above average
What's your favorite sport?	Football
Do you enjoy sleeping late?	When I can
What's the weather like right now?	Beautiful
Who tells the best jokes?	Richard Pryor
What was the last thing you dreamed about?	Can't remember
Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?	Once or twice
Do you believe in karma?	sure
Do you believe in luck?	Know any stupid rich people?
Do you like your eggs scrambled or sunny side up?	Scrambled
Do you collect anything? If so, what?	Music
Are you proud of yourself?	Yes
Are you reliable?	Yes
Have you ever given money to a bum?	Yes
What's your favorite food?	Ribeye Steak, Loaded Baked Potato
Have you ever had a secret admirer?	Yes
Do you like the smell of gasoline?	no
Do like to draw?	Is doodling drawing?
What's your favorite invention?	Air Conditioning
Is your room messy?	No!
What do you like better: oranges or apples?	Apples
Do you give in easily?	No!
Are you a good guesser?	Yes
Can you read other people's expressions?	Yes
Are you a bully?	No
Do you have a job?	Yes
What time did you wake up this morning?	9
What did you eat for breakfast this morning?	Breakfast Bar
When was the last time you showered?	1 hour ago
What do you plan on doing tomorrow?	Grocery Shopping
What's your favorite day of the week and why?	Saturday, sleep in
Do you have any nicknames?	Andy, Drew
Have you ever been scuba diving?	nope
What's your least favorite color?	don't have one
Is there someone you have been constantly thinking about? If yes, who?	a girl from 20 years ago
Would you ever go skydiving?	no
What toothpaste do you use?	Crest
Do you enjoy challenges?	Yes
What's the worst injury you have had?	Never been hurt real bad
What's the last movie you saw?	The departed
What do you want to know about the future?	How will my son be?
What does your last text message say?	yeah right
Who was the last person you spoke over the phone to?	Friend
What's your favorite school subject?	History, civics
What's your least favorite school subject?	Typing
Would you rather have money or love?	Love, I've got used to not having any money.
What is your dream vacation?	Hawaii
What is your favorite animal?	Elephant
Do you miss anyone right now?	My dad
What's the last sporting event you watched?	NBA playoffs
Do you need to do laundry?	yes, right now
Do you listen to the radio?	Internet
Where were you when 9/11 happened?	Sleeping
What do you do when vending machines steal your money?	nothing
Have you ever caught a butterfly?	yes
What color are your bed sheets?	white
What's your ringtone?	John Lee Hooker "Boom Boom"
Who was the last person to make you laugh?	Christian
Do you have any obsessions right now?	too many to mention
Do you like things that glow in the dark?	yep
What's your favorite fruity scent?	wtf?
Do you watch cartoons?	only old school ones
Have you ever sat on a roof?	all the time
Have you ever been to a different country?	Yep
Name three things in the world you dislike:	Superficial people, uptight people, picky people
Name three people in the world you dislike:	Let's not go there
Has a rumor even been spread about you?	I'm sure
Do you like sushi?	No!
Do you believe in magic?	No!
Do you hold grudges?	Longer than I should

Army of the Ozone Skip

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Biker Humour...

No comments:

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Current Favorite Sayings.................

Quotes from the 09 WC Handy Blues Fest

People Of The WC Handy Blues fest

Quotes from "Porch Night Out"

Quotes from Bowling Green Trip

Overheard in Hancocok County

Overheard at Work

Great Music Quotes

Great Guitarists

Great Keyboardists

Great Bass Players

About Me

Current Critter Count Summer 07

Summertime TV Watching

Andrew's, "Legal trouble Blues", Playlist

The Halloween Play List

2008 CURRENT CRITTER COUNT

Attack Of The Show